Ahhh....the magic of deadlines.  I gave myself a Monday (today) deadline to write a poem...and in the car on the way home on Friday evening, something was bubbling in my head.  And for the first time EVER, I pulled over and started to write it down.  By the time I got home, I had finished an entire poem!  I was so excited that I called my sweetie (who was at work) just to tell him all about it!  And get this...before I went to bed....I had completed ANOTHER one!  Soooo....looks like the block is lifted!!  And I didn't even have to call Impakt to get some inspiration!

I got an interesting comment in my journal on my last entry.  Seems SOMEONE () noticed that while I was having a "creative, poem writing" block, I didn't seem to have a "writing" block.  Interesting in that he was right.  I often go through these blocks where I can't seem to put my thoughts and words together to create a poem....but I never seem to run out of commentary.  Hmmmmmm......

My weekend was pretty productive.  I wrote quite a bit.  I cleaned and re-arranged my space at home.  I fought with my daughter....man I thought I was gonna have to put the SMACK-DOWN on her lil azz!  I ate good, slept good and managed to watch and erase everything off the DVR!  Although I forgot to watch Bishop Long and New Birth Ministries on TV yesterday morning.  My dad absolutely LOVES to watch all the TV ministry stuff and whenever I was there on a Sunday morning, he always cornered me to watch with him.  I never really cared for any of them....Creflo I could "handle" but I wouldn't even watch him on my own.  But something about Bishop Long that seems so "real" and down to earth.  He doesn't seem to have the superiority complex and "holier than you attitude" that I see in so many of the TV ministers.  He seems like a regular, average Joe....trying to preach and teach in a manner that is pleasing to God.  Anyway...I like his sermons but I missed it yesterday.

So I sent my "I need some new music" vibrations out into the universe .  I'll let you know when something happens.

I'll leave you with my latest poem.  Spread love, ya'll!  Peace!!   

Deeply Beautiful


He told me I was beautiful
But I knew he was lying
And why was he trying to confuse me
I knew he couldn't see the beauty that hides beneath
Way, way down deep
Because my body wears the scars of a milllion wars
Beaten, bruised and misused
Over time and through the years
By those who couldn't shake, face or erase their fears

My heart holds the oceans of tears that my eyes could no longer cry
Because lifetime after lifetime
I watched love and hope die, while looking to the skies
Anticipating the next moment in time when it all could begin again
How could he see past the lines in my face that when carefully traced
Revealed the demons of ten thousand lifetimes
Evil spawned
Since the dawn
Of time--died then reborn over and over again
Exposing sin upon sin murdering even the faintest
Glimmer of goodness
Was this some sort of test?

How could be see past the hopelessness in my eyes
Eyes that had cried the water that filled the river Nile
Infinite tears that spanned time and space only to appear empty now
Here in this place
Yes he told me I was beautiful but I couldn't believe my ears
Ears that could no longer hear or discern the truth from a lie
Ears that long ago ceased to recognize
Anything of honor or truth because they had been singed by the fires of
Great warriors whos sole mission was to kill good spirits
So how is it
That he sees my beauty?

When my hands wear the blood of murderers and victims
Brought down by hate-fear-religion-politics
Lies-passion and lust
Giving birth to generations of mistrust
Mistrust in the souls of the ancestors who came before me
Who now live within me
Who's voices I now hear in my head
That speak to me and through me
With sounds I sometimes don't recognize
How can he see my beauty?

When each strand of my hair carries the coldest wind
Multiplied by ten
To posses the strength to destrop an entire species
And force God to begin again
When I carry the weight of each parallel universe on my back
Strapped to wipe out the world on a whim
Him
Him
How does he see my beauty
When all I see is ugly
How does he see my beauty
Just how deep in me can he see

Because now I'm thinking that maybe
He can teach me how to see to such depths.

copyright, 2004  Blu Breeze